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Text book for assignment
Understanding Communication and Aging: Developing Knowledge & Awareness. 2nd Edition Written by: Jake Harwood. Publishing information: Cognella Academic Publishing ([email protected] or 800-200-3908. 2018. ISBN-13: 978-1516521296 or ISBN-10: 1516521293.
Reading Test C—-
There are a total of four questions here for section 1!
Sometimes it helps to see what people who are going through an experience think and feel.Intergenerational conflicts and resolution strategies are obviously communicatively complex and often unavailable to study except as a participant.Beloware examples of letters written to author Malcom Boyd by elderly individuals and their adult children.(These excerpts come for the magazine Modern Maturity.Malcom Boyd is sort of like an advice columnist, a “Dear Abby”).You have two questions that pertain to these seven letters with Malcom Boyd’s responses.
Question One:What strategies do you come up with to remedy the problems presented here?What role do you think communication plays in that process.Consider the number of times Boyd advises his letter writer to “self-disclose.”Can self-disclosure be a bad thing?
Question Two:As you read these excepts from letters written about intergenerational problems, see if you can see evidence for Intergenerational Solidarity Theory or Life-Span Attachment Theory.Does the information below support both theories, only one of the theories or neither theory?
–Excerpts—
Malcom Boyd writes:“Intergenerational conflicts and misunderstandings can cause pain and emotional bruises.Instead of finding nurturing and love within the family circle, some people encounter exactly the opposite.”
Letter # 1:A Nebraska man writes:“I don’t look forward to family gatherings because I come back with my self-esteem reduced to zero and feeling like a stereotypical older geezer.I’m rebuffed by my own children, giggled at, and made to feel my thoughts aren’t important.”
Letter #2:An Indiana reader describes in detail a truly unhappy situation.“I gave my money to my children, trusting them to take care of my needs when I grew older.But now that I have no money left, they have discarded me.How stupid I was not to take care of my security!I’m alone now, really alone.I need to understand what I did wrong.I guess I gave too much, cared too much.”
Boyd writes:“Many letters from elderly people tell similar stories.I also hear from their sons and daughters, members of the so-called sandwhich generation, whose reports have a different focus.”
Letter #3:A fifty-four-year-old woman writes from New York about the “hard burden” she bears in caring for her eighty-eight-year-old mother:“I’m angry that I am increasingly having to be a parent to someone whose self-centeredness and narcissism made her unable to be a mother to me.The simple, awful fact is that I respect my mother and love her as my flesh and blood, but I don’t like her and I wish she weren’t in my life.My fear is that she’s going to live on and on, growing more and more needful of my ‘parenting,’ and that I won’t be free of her presence until I’m approaching seventy myself.”
Letter #4:“My challenge involves my relationship with my mother-in-law of twenty-nine years.She’s eighty
-nine.She has lost all semblance of a positive-outlook.She speaks only of her aches and pains and the bleakness of her life.I cannot deal with this negative approach to living.Whatever I try to do for her, nothing is ever right.”
Boyd writes:“Reflecting on these letters, I find the key word for what both sides need is empathy—which the dictionary defines as identification with and understanding of the situation, feelings, and motives of another person.Without this empathy, a great abyss can exist where there should be communication.Can we overemphasize that there’s no substitute for honest communication between people?Tell others what you feel!Try to explain why you feel as you do.This can lead to real understanding.”
Letter #5:“Sometimes I’m not delighted to hear what my mother needs and wants because it impinges on my time and energy.However, I prefer to know what she’s thinking and feeling, even if it results in conflict.The resolution of such conflicts has strengthened our friendship and the community that is our family.Love, I believe, is being open and seeking a resolution that may require mutual sacrafice.”
Letter # 6:“Many years ago my mother gave me a book that set my life on a self-respecting, self-valuing course.It says it’s quite okay to love yourself.If you don’t how can anyone else love you?If you think you’re not worth loving, then, by cracky, you’re not.If you think you’re not worth much, you will always be a problem—if not a pain—to be around.Is that what you want for yourself?Not I.”
Letter #7:“My life was lonely after I lost my husband,”a woman writes.“I volunteered at the hospital, bowled twice a week, was active at my church and kept my home.But there was still a terrible void in my life.Then my 23-year-old granddaughter told me to keep Wednesday evenings open for her.We take turns cooking, or sometimes we go out.You have no idea what this has done for me.We share a meal, talk, and just enjoy our friendship.Our talk may be about her work or what I’ve done the past week—just nice conversation.We sometimes cry together.But we laugh together as well.”
Boyd writes:“This grandmother and granddaughter have found a happy way to bridge the generation gap.Others could profit from their example.”
These last two questions are not based on the excerpts above.
Question Three:What functions do grandparents serve?How do the roles of grandfathers and grandmothers differ?While several typologies of grand-parenting styles exist, why do researchers argue that no such typology will ever capture the essence of the grandparent relationship?Be sure to discuss the role communication plays in your answer.
Question Four:Research suggests that marital partners become more like each other as time passes.Discuss this process of convergence and the role communication plays in this process.Be sure to address the notion of a socially constructed reality in your answer.
PART II :
Consider the Mary Pipher chapters from Another Country, (6) “Homesick for Heaven,” and (7) “The Weariest River” (located in Lectures 10, and 11 as assigned reading). What messages about communication and aging are conveyed as you make sense of each selection? —Consider the attitudes that emerge from each chapter, the significance of relationships, reflection, expression, that each evokes. Consider each chapter separately, and then comment on how thinking about each in relation to the other provides you with comparisons, contrasts, and conclusions about communication/communicating.
PART III: